April 13, 2005 - Listen

Listen

[...spring break...]



(I’m deaf – help me defeat this

Lend me a hearing aid, I’ll buy the battery

I’d read your lips

But I could never look upon your face)



I wish I knew how you speak

So that I would know how to listen

I know that would reduce your majesty to simplicity

And less effort for me



I just am overwhelmed

I cannot concentrate

I cannot focus

I cannot quiet the din in my mind



So many mediums for your voice

This time which did you choose

Are there fragments from each that I must piece together

Are you a human voice

Are you in metaphor, parable, analogy

Are you in scripture

Are you the faintest whisper that spoke to Elijah

Are you the awesome flame that humbled Moses

Are you the man that wrestled Jacob

Are you the light that blinded Saul/Paul

Are you the dreams of the night

Are you what prods my mind

Are you what tugs at my heart

When do you want me to be logical

When should I look in the mystical



The silence proclaims the answer

Frustrated that I cannot hear it

Dizzied by the frenzy of possibility—

Daunting—all too often resort to apathy

Half-heartedness won’t get me there

I know you hear me, listen as I say

I’m trying I’m trying

I’ll never utter another word

I’ll listen forever

I want to hear you